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22 2012 Tini - Pencil: Jim and Ariel by JusTiniStilborn

:iconrikae:
I just love the tenderness in this picture-the flow of her hair and the look in her eyes. It is indeed very dreamy, especially with all the white space you left.

At the same time it is this white space that makes things worse for this drawing. The grey-yellowish tint surrounding the character seems too much of a contrast on the bright white background. A pure white background would work fine. Even if I think pencil pictures should generally be grayscaled to eliminate the yellowish tint (unless a desired effect) and make them easier for clean up, I still think that an evenly yellowish tint for the whole picture would have been better than a yellow on white background.
The way the bodies are cropped on the left side seem to enhance this feeling of the drawing being pasted on top of a white background and hugely distracting from the main point.
Adding to this is the huge dA watermark which, considering how tiny the image is, makes it almost impossible to see the details.
A range of computer software can be used to create your own watermark in a more unobtrusive way.
I think the way to go here is either
-crop the drawing entirely with no background for a greater impact or
-move the drawing down a bit to avoid centring, convert the picture to Grayscale and clean up excessive tones to make it seamlessly merge with the background. leaving more background can be a bit distracting but can add to a dreamier feeling if composition is handled with care.
-create a smaller watermark

Most of my notes concern the editing as you see. The drawing itself is nice with a decent composition, nice contrast and a tender atmosphere. Drawing more than one person in a picture is always hard to deal with, especially interacting bodies -hugging, kissing etc. so a good job with that :thumbsup:
The Artist thought this was FAIR
7 out of 7 deviants thought this was fair.

Comments


:iconjustinistilborn:
JusTiniStilborn Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
fixed! :D
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:iconjustinistilborn:
JusTiniStilborn Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
firstly, thanks so much for taking so much to consider and write about my work! It means a great deal to me that it caught your eye that much!! I honestly scanned and uploaded I haven't edited it at all but you are absolutely right the tint I have never noticed and it could be cropped to give a better view and I will be definitely taking both of your suggestions and editing this image!!! I always just use the Da watermark because I'm too lazy to put it on all my images because I have sooooo many and I'm scared they may be stolen but maybe for ones this this my more popular images I should consider it. So thanks all your points are great and I'm glad you enjoy the composition and technical skills too c: I really appreciate your thoughts and comments!! <3
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:iconrikae:
Rikae Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013
You're welcome! Thank you for your kind words, I'm glad it was helpful and was amazed to see you've actually changed your work! It's rather rare that people consider changing anything once the piece is finished and they've uploaded it. I think that it really works better now-I can see the details and the mark doesn't bother me as much. If you want to get rid of any excess grays outside the figures (can be a real pain to do sometimes), I've found that the dodge tool in Photoshop(set to "highlights" and around 3-5% helps a bit :)

As far as theft is concerned-I know how you feel, there's a lot of that going around. I think people either steel it to claim as their own and seek attention and fans OR they need a nice picture for a banner/book cover/bag/t-shirt and don't want to pay for it. You can't do a lot about the first one. Concerning art theft for commercial reasons, I think they seldom want pencil work since it's not so popular and "flashy" (sadly, since I love it). So the possibility of theft is on the lower side here. A good preventive method is to upload pictures with low resolution-say under 150 dpi. That makes an image almost impossible to print (and look good). There's always the possibility of theft, whatever you do but I think it's a risk worth taking to show your work.
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:iconjustinistilborn:
JusTiniStilborn Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Well you took the time out to suggest improvments and I think that the ones you provided were fantastic of really constructive help! oh i know of dodge i've used it in darkroom photography but never in photoshop! I kinda like them though adds a sense of ambience? I love pencil work too and I don't mind if people want to use my stuff as a banner, i subscribe to the Creative Commons license because as long as credit is given I'm happy people want to share and celebrate my art but yes I agree most people think my works are really unfinished because I enjoy drawing the lines more lol and i agree it's worth taking the risk the problem is that I'm in University and I've sold some works and been shown in galleries and my sister has been the victim of identity theft even though she's Deviantart and Tumblr famous so i'm scared is all lol but lowering dpi could work! I will consider doing that c: Thanks so much you are such a nice person and fun to talk to c:
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:iconrikae:
Rikae Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013
That must've been horrible for your sister! But I guess precisely people who are famous on the internet get their work stolen a lot. Guess that's why my work never gets stolen XD But anyhow, I don't wish it woud happen to anyone, it's horrible! >_>
And don't worry about unfinished work-I love pencil sketches the most in this world! "Finished"is an adjective I'm most annoyed with because a lot of people think that if it's not absolutely perfect it's not good. And perfect is kind of boring :meow:
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:iconjustinistilborn:
JusTiniStilborn Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
yes i agree and hence why none of mine has been stolen either!!! yea it's happened several times to her! someone has even make accounts with her pictures and pretend to be her, at the time she was pregnant and they'd talk about the baby. Your right I don't worry about ti because some artists like Chloe Piene her works that don't look finished...
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:iconrikae:
Rikae Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013
Oh, that's an interesting new artist I learned about-just checked her on the web! Thanks! :D
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:iconjustinistilborn:
JusTiniStilborn Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
anytime!!!!!!!!
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